Friday 25 March 2011

Woman-hood


This is such a strange word. It one of those words like menstruation and breasts that are so uncomfortably and clinically feminine. Words that scream you are a WOMAN! I haven’t always been a fan of describing myself as a woman. I mean when I visualise myself in the future, what I see is a woman but in the present...nope. I know I ‘m still young, but this may be a feeling that I carry along with me as I grow older. I prefer the daintier version ‘lady’... or anything like that. Woman is almost a call to fill the shoes of all the ‘women’ before you...women like my mother, my principal in secondary school, Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, the first female African president and all the motherly, womanly, strong women out there. It’s a call to play your role in the fabric of society. The point of this whole preamble is about the essence of womanhood. What is the essence of womanhood that is so indefinable and almost intimidating? Are we simply the child bearers and home makers, meaningless without being placed in a family as wife and mother? Today’s modern feminists reject this idea. We are more than that they say, we are also breadwinners and presidents and CEO’s and activists ...we are powerful and equal to men.



Are we meant to be powerful and equal to men? Aren’t we the supposed “weaker sex”? Don’t shoot me yet, I consider myself to be a feminist. Not a bra-burning feminist but the type who wants to see men and women given the same opportunities and the same rewards without discriminating on the basis of gender, the type who is against the exploitation of womens’ strengths and weaknesses to promote stupid agendas. As I have grown older my view on the roles of women have taken a beating. At first I thought we were strong and oh- so-powerful, and then I thought we were hopelessly weak...and now? I’m realising that we are strong in our seemingly weak states. Are you confused yet? Lol.



I am reading this book called Woman: An asset to the nation by Nike Adeyemi, Sam Adeyemi’s wife. Some of the things she says leave me rather err...x_x but the more I read this book, the more I see the shape of a woman utterly different from the one I had envisioned all my life. A different brand of feminism than the one the world tries to sell today.



She is strong yet gentle, wise yet humble, productive but not wasteful, beautiful but not vain...she is a complex walking paradox. She is very much a Proverbs 31 woman...a woman I have always been very suspicious about (Like really?! Is she superwoman? And ...you want me to be like that?...err no thanks! she’s rather too ‘womanly for me) BUT, the more I read about her, the more I realise that I need to be like her to be anything like the woman I imagine to be in future. When God created the world, he gave Eve to Adam, and to the world, so that everything would be good. We are the finishing touch. Without a woman playing a role in the way that she ought to the world would not be good. And the state of today’s world speaks for itself. I got taught something like this in class yesterday...some guy (of course it would be a guy*rolls eyes*) thinks so too.



I have ALWAYS supported the “what a man can do, a woman can do better” movement. BUT the more I learn, I realise it really should be “What a man can do, a woman can do differently”. I am still learning this but men aren’t our competition, they are our partners. Hard to imagine partnering with some big headed chauvinist lazy pig though! I feel women/girls/ladies need to be educated on what being a woman entails. There are very few role models nowadays. Us girls need to stop being lazy and “unwise”. And I think guys need lessons too! Most of them have warped ideals of women...they want Naomi Campbell in the kitchen (^ _-) lol. God bless all the guys out there that recognise the true value of women!

Another question for another day, is can we have it all? Be super career women and super mummies and wives? Do we need to be all of these things to justify our womanhood?

6 comments:

  1. i guess u answered the last question with a pic of Mitchelle Obama, she may not b perfect but i love her

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  2. yup! I kinda put her there as an example of such a woman, first lady, wife, mother n she used to be a lawyer before...so If she can have it all...maybe we alll can!

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  3. I am a man and believes in the equality of genders..but it is foolishness to believe that men and women are equal in potential.. Men are more stronger,more thinking,more mighty..They carved the world..they invented technologies,,formulated physics...Women have contributed so much to the society but their contributions to its advancement are very less

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  4. @ Anonymous- thanks for the comment but I cannot help being slightly miffed by it. How can you believe in the equality of genders if you do not believe we have the same potentials??
    The whole point of this post was to point out that women have made and continue to make contributions to society in different, but no less greater ways.
    Try imagining the world without women and we'll see just how useful "mighty, great thinking men" would be. You only need to look at women like Ellen Johnson Sirleaf to see that we are equally as great thinking. Even if all women are not like her, there would still be no society to even advance without women

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  5. by equality of genders i meant ,both men and women should be treated in the same way by the society..i never said "equality of potentials"..Most of the women like u are self contained.they stick to some principles and are very efficient inside the framework of it..but they never like to think beyond that frame..
    I have seen a lot of women demanding the authority of world by citing the importance of womb..but without a man ,that womb is of no use ..remember..Feminism became prominent not because of u..but of men's soft corner towards women..

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  6. I just realised that I never replied this! I think I was lost for words at the time but...
    Everything you were saying was slightly making sense until you said "Remember feminism became prominent not because of you but because of mens soft corner towards women"...-_- !!!!

    so all the women that lost their lives fighting for women...that was because of mens soft "corner" for us right.

    I really hope you one day see life with clear, insightful and understanding eyes.

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